Car Leasing for my Crazy Granny
It was the summer of ‘94. just me and my grandma, chilling in the kitchen. She was pondering car leasing, while heating hot chocolate sauce.
I was taking full advantage of the laminated kitchen floor, and doing way above the national speed limit in my segway. I had visions of a T-Rex on my tail, RUUNNN! My grandma on the other hand was picking home grown carrots from her garden, trying her hardest not to follow alice down the hole…
You should have me, I was having an absolute blast when suddently I skidded to avoid a baby roo that had found its way into the house. I fell straight onto the hot sauce. Ouch!
I screamed, so hard I may have ruptured my voice box, 3rd degree burns were bubbling on my skin. My grandma heard the almighty roar and ran in fronm the garden.
I couldn’t believe that she didn’t even warn me about the hot pan that now had attracted 60% burns to my face, what a clown.
I wasn’t very pleased when she told me she was distracted by thoughts of car leasing and that she had forgotten about the hot sauce. I collected her things and asked her to leave our house. With that, I jumped on my segway and cruised to see my Doc, Karl.
My face was burnt and sore so for ease I grabbed a taxi and took the short ride home on 4 wheels. When I returned home, to my surprise, my Grandma was pouring petrol threw our letterbox and had a match in her right hand ready to set the semi-detached alight.
With my segway by my side, I questioned the old hag, and all she could answer with was ‘Oh dear, I was only trying to claim some insurance for my car leasing dream’.
I figured she didn’t have long left until she was completely insane, so I invited her back in. sat her down and began the process of explaining car leasing to her. The next day I found her a car leasing company, and told her to go forth and be happy. I was left. it was just me my burns and my segway against the world!!
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